If you read my previous episodes, then you’ve been getting the idea of how very unpleasant the long road I’ve been traveling on has been. I want to pick up that theme but, this time I want to tell the other side of the story. Yes, I’ve had to live with almost nothing for a long time but, if I never told you how God provided during those years, you would not have anything positive to hang on to. Faith is inspired by stories of how God provided for others, and I have some of those to tell you myself.

Yes, God Provides But…

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7 (KJV)

This is how God provides when you are walking out the narrow road to the fulfillment of your true life purpose. Sometimes God’s provision is obvious, other times it seems He’s nowhere to be found. This is partly about the Kingdom of God providing exactly as the Bible says, and partly that the lack of what you need is a training ground for character development and increasing your level of faith. In no particular order, here are some of the “highlights” of my experience during the last few years…

There was the time when I put the last $2.40 in the gas tank and one minute later, I got $100 sent to me by Cash App and a few pizzas to pick up. That was by far one of the most remarkable instant miracles. I never told anyone I just spent my last dollar when that money came in. That was one of the experiences that helped me realize I really could have faith for God to provide when everything went to zero.

But every time, watching the little bit of money we had go to zero was an extremely trying time. That experience in Colorado lasted one and a half years. When that ended, conditions improved but even then, it was not without many challenges.

As I’ve mentioned before, there were two nights when my wife and I had to sleep in the car overnight. Partly it was because we didn’t have enough money for a hotel but, the other part was we didn’t have enough for the additional refundable incidentals charge on top of that. The second night wasn’t the worst experience because we already had to do that once before. True, God did not come through for us those nights with a place to stay. But, we did have a car and barely enough gas to survive without having to live under a tree.

There were hotels we had to stay in that were worse than the conditions I had when I was deployed to Iraq. One of those was a drug house. It was absolutely horrible. Another was one step beyond bare concrete walls. Then another, was basically a zoo. The floors were a filthy mess, some rooms had dog and human excrement all over. One person died in a room, a fight broke out in a room next to me, and very sketchy homeless drug users hung around right near the doors that didn’t exactly stay locked. In the midst of that, we at least had a place to stay one mile from the airport so I could easily go there and have a mental vacation.

Despite all that I’m saying in this episode, I’m still only scratching the surface of how bad things have been. Believe me, there’s a lot more I haven’t even said anything about yet and won’t until a later time.

Just Barely Enough

Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?

Matthew 6:25 (KJV)

Backing up long before the “Colorado adventure”, when I had to move out of my apartment in Virginia because I would have run out of money, I ended up with a place to stay with a relative (for the next 6 years). It wasn’t without issues (family and visitors that looked at me sideways because I was well over 40 and wasn’t exactly living like educated people do). But it all worked out rather well and the house was quite nice.

At the time I’m writing this episode, I’m living in the smallest hotel room I’ve ever stayed in. It’s not bad but, during the summer there was a mosquito infestation and when fall came, there was the smell of gas in the room from the ancient gas heater. It was definitely not the worst conditions (better than the hotels from hell in Colorado). Plus, because I was back in my hometown again, I got money from a close relative to get back into flying again as a pilot. Just saying… this is what it looks like when you are following God’s plan for your life.

Yes, He will come through for you (as long as you don’t do something stupid). Yes, you will be provided for. NO, it won’t be “up to your standards”. The wilderness is MANDATORY for all people who have any desire to do what God put them here for. Again, even Jesus had to go through one of these!

This story is far from over!! In an upcoming episode, we are going to discuss the warnings God gives you about the people who verbally and physically attack you and otherwise try to disrupt God’s plan for you. When you are really in God’s Kingdom, you have the same lethal force backing you that a military or police force has in the natural realm.

YES, God will do exactly as He did in the Bible by killing those who come against His Kingdom. That includes those who, like myself, are an agent of that eternal government here on Earth. I’ve had several dreams about that happening to evil people and I’ve had people verbally harass and physically attack me in real life. Let’s just say, for those people, unless they repent, it does NOT end well for them.

There’s A Point To All This

My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction: For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.

Proverbs 3:11-12 (KJV)

The wilderness is a form of God’s chastisement which is required for character development and in order to reach the level of full sonship maturity where He gives you power over the elements of creation (supernatural marvelic abilities). If you do not reach sonship, it is impossible to fulfill your purpose here on earth.

The point here is that, while going through God’s ancient wilderness training program, God will provide but, don’t think it’s all going to be to your liking. It’s not supposed to be!! The wilderness is a testing ground where you only get just barely enough. It is not the place where you have any more than the absolute basic necessities. The longer that experience lasted, the more character development took place and the more faith I managed to develop.

Going through the wilderness is God’s way of telling you that you are in His plan and that He expects you to pass all the tests. It is an extremely unpleasant time but, it leads to the promised land where you fulfill your purpose and receive more than you could ask or imagine – that the world may benefit from what God developed in you.

To be continued…

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